Passing the GOAT and Other Terrible Ideas
Distance: Just shy of 125km
Elevation gain: About 6,000m
Location: One of the most jaw-dropping places you could wear trail shoes.
The Build-Up
The build-up to the race didn’t go to plan. I had tanked a race a month earlier and came here to exorcise some demons, if possible.
The race starts at the sensible hour of 23:00 in Cortina d’Ampezzo. The whole town was out to watch — which was either touching or slightly mad, depending on your caffeine intake. But this was Italy, so naturally everyone was having a post-dinner espresso.
I’d qualified into the second elite group — close enough to the front to avoid a 1,600-person wrestling match to get started, but far enough from the real elites to avoid delusions.
Right in front of me? Courtney Dauwalter, Ben Dhiman, Josh Wade, Andreas Reiteter…
I was not going to be racing these people.
Early Miles
They bolted like startled deer. I sensibly let them go and tucked into the second group, ticking off the first climbs and wishing I could see any of the scenery everyone talks about.
First crewed aid station at 42km — I’m in 30th, feeling good. I foolishly told my crew:
“Once the sun’s up, I think I can catch 10.”
This is the kind of confidence that only ends one of two ways: glory… or a slow public unravelling, usually dissected on the Pembs Ultra WhatsApp Group.
Passing Courtney (Briefly…)
A caffeine gel kicked in on the Tre Cime di Lavaredo climb, and I even passed Courtney.
This, I knew, was either a great sign… or an act of pure idiocy.
The sun was rising, the legs felt fresh, the scenery was incredible, and my playlist blessed me with:
- Walking in Memphis
- Say It Isn’t So
- Thanks for the Memories
I charged the descent like the finish line was at the bottom.
The 6km douche-grade climb after that — not flat, but not a proper hill either — felt like a marathon of mild suffering. Into the next aid station, now in 20th, I tried not to look too broken.
Trouble at Forcella
Then came the Forcella climb, and it all went sideways. Bent double, hands on knees, hoping to vomit, I resorted to some well-worn tricks:
- Gels
- Electrolytes
- Negotiating with myself to run 10 steps, walk 20
Somehow, the legs worked again on the descent, and I clawed back places, joining a group of four.
From 85–95km, I was working hard climbing through a valley that was heating up quickly.
Out of nowhere, Courtney floated past me smelling of bubblegum, offering the high praise of:
“You’re doing so good.”
And then she was gone — not to be seen again until her post-race interview.
Into the Best Scenery
The back-to-back crewed stations at Col Gallina and Passo Giau were welcome, though the section in between felt like climbing through wet concrete.
The tourists looked annoyingly happy — and for good reason. This was the best scenery on the course! Even through the graft, I was grinning like an idiot.
The Final Push
The final stretch had a few nasty surprise climbs — perfect for inducing a quiet tantrum.
Running alongside Altra athlete Ugo in 16th/17th, we skipped the last aid station and hurled ourselves into the 10km descent with mutinous toes.
Cortina appeared after 14 hours 20 minutes.
Top 20 in a stacked field.
I found a tree, lay down, and fell asleep for 40 minutes…
The glamorous ending to achieving your goals.
